As I find myself just having arrived back from a, shall we say, 'gay weekend' in the Danish capital of Copenhagen, combining this with a trip to Lund in southern Sweden, I thought what better time to do a new entry for you all!
As always ladies and gents', fasten those seat belts! Here. We. Go.
So, 'confessions of a twenty something' you may be asking yourselves right about now. What's the relevance? What's the point? What am I trying to get at with this one? Well it's a simple one really, as I find myself coming to the end of the most incredible year in Stockholm, the academic year winding down for summer and above all, just back from what was the most hilarious and downright ridiculous weekend spent among the Danes, life, in short, is pretty damn sweet. It's making me realise the true beauty of being the age that I am - an age at which I'm old enough to be taken seriously in this world, but perhaps more importantly, an age where failure and not knowing your exact path is also acceptable. Conclusion? Being in your twenties is nothing less than exhilarating!
What upsets me, however, is the extent to which many worry about their twenty something lifestyle far too much. It's almost as if when the nineteenth year passes and the twentieth birthday comes around, a sudden sense of panic, anxiety and 'shit I need to get my life together' sort of feeling takes over and therefore dominates many people's lives right through until their crowning thirtieth....if you ask me, this is the completely wrong mentality.
Let's get it out there, being a twenty something is quite the conversation sparker, especially these days - we've been called everything from pre-adults and emerging adults to millennials and the defining decade, oh, and sometimes even the lost decade...talk about some serious labelling right?, but it doesn't stop there - we're apparently going to graduate during the worst economy the world has seen in years and to survive this, we need to be prepared to do nothing less than pull ourselves up by our bootstraps to recover what is apparently being lost in society as we know it today. We've been told that the majority of life's most significant events take place by the time we reach thirty-five and thus, have this intuitive sense that the foundations we lay now will apparently continue to carry us throughout our lives. Now as if this is not enough, being a twenty something also appears to dominate the internet world like it's some sort of sensation...we're seeing viral trends on Facebook and Twitter receiving obsessive levels of attention about the "20 Mistakes You Don't Want to Make as A 20 Something" and "20 Way's to Make it Through Your 20's".
But why would anyone want to hurry things up and 'make it through' their 20s?
...
So let's have a bit of a reality check here, because to be frank this mentality is, in my opinion, so far from being right. What if this is not what our twenties are for? What if this is not the purpose of being a twenty something? What if our twenties are for making mistakes, experiencing what life has to offer and above all, finding ourself and in other words, NOT establishing ourselves for the rest of our lives? My point? It's OKAY to not have a plan as a twenty something. It's OKAY not to have it all figured out and have every microscopic plan/detail in place. The truth is guys, we're all worried, we're all constantly planning ahead in our minds and panicking over the endless amount of possibilities that could happen and god knows what couldn't. Now i'm not saying it's not important to have a rough outline and to start taking control of your own decisions and lifestyle throughout your twenties, however, there is a clear difference between the aforementioned and an absolute panicking state of mind right through what is supposed to be the 'best time of your life'.
The reality is that this obsessive twenty something behaviour is unfortunately, not so uncommon. It's this that i'm trying to get at, it's this negative mindset and behaviour that seems to be representing the typical twenty something nowadays as we know it - a freaked out, panicking, worried ball of stress. Is this really how we want to remember our twenties when we look back?
One thing is clear to me, us twenty somethings are constantly seen searching for answers on how to make sense of a life period that in reality, we're supposedly leading, albeit trying to. Oh the irony! Should we thus know the answers to every aspect of life as a twenty something? Is this what is expected of us? Well I sure as hell hope not because i'm nowhere close! Nevertheless, it seems that this is what we think should be the case. The reality? - quite the opposite. I too am part of such a generation. A generation of twenty somethings who has not got it all figured out, a generation that does mistakes, a generation in which failure and only a rough outline of a life plan is acceptable. Now yes, what one does in their twenties is of course important and i'm by no means saying it isn't. Many of us out there know exactly what they want and so spend little or not time beating about the bush in order to obtain it. If you're one of those people then that's fantastic! Holla at y'all! However, what i'm trying to say is that for those of you who are not so sure of your righteous path, DO NOT STRESS. Make more time for the smaller things in life and just go with the flow, life has a funny old way of working things out. I promise you that. If there's anything i've learned over this year it's that what's meant to be, will be.
If any of you gorgeous people out there spend sleepless nights wondering whether or not you're on the brink of becoming the next big thing or, at the other end of the spectrum, find yourselves teetering dangerously close to spending the rest of your life in your parents' basement, read on. Below you will find a list of twenty things that, in my opinion anyway, forms some perfect advice/nerve settling information about making the most of your glamorous twenties. You only get them once guys, make them count! There really is nothing worse than regret.
I see it like this, i'd rather look back at my life and say "I can't believe I did that" rather than say "I wish I did that".
So with this in mind...
As always ladies and gents', fasten those seat belts! Here. We. Go.
So, 'confessions of a twenty something' you may be asking yourselves right about now. What's the relevance? What's the point? What am I trying to get at with this one? Well it's a simple one really, as I find myself coming to the end of the most incredible year in Stockholm, the academic year winding down for summer and above all, just back from what was the most hilarious and downright ridiculous weekend spent among the Danes, life, in short, is pretty damn sweet. It's making me realise the true beauty of being the age that I am - an age at which I'm old enough to be taken seriously in this world, but perhaps more importantly, an age where failure and not knowing your exact path is also acceptable. Conclusion? Being in your twenties is nothing less than exhilarating!
What upsets me, however, is the extent to which many worry about their twenty something lifestyle far too much. It's almost as if when the nineteenth year passes and the twentieth birthday comes around, a sudden sense of panic, anxiety and 'shit I need to get my life together' sort of feeling takes over and therefore dominates many people's lives right through until their crowning thirtieth....if you ask me, this is the completely wrong mentality.
Let's get it out there, being a twenty something is quite the conversation sparker, especially these days - we've been called everything from pre-adults and emerging adults to millennials and the defining decade, oh, and sometimes even the lost decade...talk about some serious labelling right?, but it doesn't stop there - we're apparently going to graduate during the worst economy the world has seen in years and to survive this, we need to be prepared to do nothing less than pull ourselves up by our bootstraps to recover what is apparently being lost in society as we know it today. We've been told that the majority of life's most significant events take place by the time we reach thirty-five and thus, have this intuitive sense that the foundations we lay now will apparently continue to carry us throughout our lives. Now as if this is not enough, being a twenty something also appears to dominate the internet world like it's some sort of sensation...we're seeing viral trends on Facebook and Twitter receiving obsessive levels of attention about the "20 Mistakes You Don't Want to Make as A 20 Something" and "20 Way's to Make it Through Your 20's".
But why would anyone want to hurry things up and 'make it through' their 20s?
...
So let's have a bit of a reality check here, because to be frank this mentality is, in my opinion, so far from being right. What if this is not what our twenties are for? What if this is not the purpose of being a twenty something? What if our twenties are for making mistakes, experiencing what life has to offer and above all, finding ourself and in other words, NOT establishing ourselves for the rest of our lives? My point? It's OKAY to not have a plan as a twenty something. It's OKAY not to have it all figured out and have every microscopic plan/detail in place. The truth is guys, we're all worried, we're all constantly planning ahead in our minds and panicking over the endless amount of possibilities that could happen and god knows what couldn't. Now i'm not saying it's not important to have a rough outline and to start taking control of your own decisions and lifestyle throughout your twenties, however, there is a clear difference between the aforementioned and an absolute panicking state of mind right through what is supposed to be the 'best time of your life'.
The reality is that this obsessive twenty something behaviour is unfortunately, not so uncommon. It's this that i'm trying to get at, it's this negative mindset and behaviour that seems to be representing the typical twenty something nowadays as we know it - a freaked out, panicking, worried ball of stress. Is this really how we want to remember our twenties when we look back?
One thing is clear to me, us twenty somethings are constantly seen searching for answers on how to make sense of a life period that in reality, we're supposedly leading, albeit trying to. Oh the irony! Should we thus know the answers to every aspect of life as a twenty something? Is this what is expected of us? Well I sure as hell hope not because i'm nowhere close! Nevertheless, it seems that this is what we think should be the case. The reality? - quite the opposite. I too am part of such a generation. A generation of twenty somethings who has not got it all figured out, a generation that does mistakes, a generation in which failure and only a rough outline of a life plan is acceptable. Now yes, what one does in their twenties is of course important and i'm by no means saying it isn't. Many of us out there know exactly what they want and so spend little or not time beating about the bush in order to obtain it. If you're one of those people then that's fantastic! Holla at y'all! However, what i'm trying to say is that for those of you who are not so sure of your righteous path, DO NOT STRESS. Make more time for the smaller things in life and just go with the flow, life has a funny old way of working things out. I promise you that. If there's anything i've learned over this year it's that what's meant to be, will be.
If any of you gorgeous people out there spend sleepless nights wondering whether or not you're on the brink of becoming the next big thing or, at the other end of the spectrum, find yourselves teetering dangerously close to spending the rest of your life in your parents' basement, read on. Below you will find a list of twenty things that, in my opinion anyway, forms some perfect advice/nerve settling information about making the most of your glamorous twenties. You only get them once guys, make them count! There really is nothing worse than regret.
I see it like this, i'd rather look back at my life and say "I can't believe I did that" rather than say "I wish I did that".
So with this in mind...
1. Don't be afraid to jump at an opportunity. In our 20s, we all need to realise that we're still early in our career and life, so we not only have less serious obligations, but we also aren't entrenched in our work and what we've built as our career. When an opportunity presents itself that seems unique, intriguing or interesting, then go for it! You truly never know where your experiences will lead you.
2. Don't waste your time doing something you hate. Find a job or a course at university or whatever it may be that makes you excited to wake up in the morning. And with this in mind, if you can, save a little money! Having a little financial freedom will allow you more room to pursue your passions freely.
3. Stop complaining. You are ultimately responsible for your own happiness and success. If there is something you see wrong in the world, you can do something about it! Those that sit back and complain don't get very far, right?
4. Pick up the phone and make a cold call. Don't buy all this bullshit about what others say is the 'best option for you' - go after your own passions. Don't be afraid to make that cold call, speak up for something you believe in, or try something that scares you every now and then. Ask for what you want and you will get there a lot sooner than you think! There are no limits to what you can accomplish at such a prime time in your life.
5. Write down your non-negotiables. Our twenties are a time to be selfish and to figure ourselves out, what we like and more importantly what we are not willing to tolerate. Figuring out our non-negotiables is a must to happiness in the personal and professional areas of our life. Amen.
6. Follow through. Set goals each month and meet them. Enough said.
7. Be revolutionary. Don't be afraid to be radical in thought or action. This is your time so be in that state of mind. Throughout history, progress has been led by young folks who pushed the boundaries of 'acceptable'.
8. Do that 'thing' you're afraid of. If you're scared of heights, skydive. If you're scared of public speaking, make a speech. If you're scared of failure, do something you know you aren't good at. Facing small fears will make you a bolder and braver person in all other aspects of your life and thus those big scary decisions - moving to another country, quitting a job, starting a degree, won't seem so scary.
9. Be willing to embarrass yourself. The possibility for greatness and embarrassment both exist in the same space. If you're not willing to be embarrassed, you're not willing to be great. The biggest risk of our twenties would be never taking any risks at all - it's FUN to be embarrassed sometimes. It shows a strength of character and a sense of humour that is clearly in tact. Oh, and for the record, it can often result in unexpectedly good things appearing at your doorstep. Just saying...
10. Accept failure. Accept failure and welcome it as the stepping stone to success. When you win, be gracious, but when you fail, get back up and try harder next time. It's not going to kill you. I promise.
11. Stop talking and start listening. I've come to see that many peoples default during their twenties can sometimes be to assume they know most of the answers. I'm terrible for this myself, not going to lie. Conclusion? Go into everything with a humble assumption that you can learn something from every single person in a room or situation, then listen first and ask questions later.
12. Look ahead. Dare to be intentional with your life, and to be real with yourself about what you think you may want in 10 years. It's okay to start planning, just don't let it dominate your life and become and endless journey of unending stress.
13. Make time to stop and reflect. Reflecting will allow you to see the signs that the world is giving you about your purpose. Once you find that purpose, jump at every opportunity to live for that purpose - hold on tight by the way, it's going to be a bumpy ride!
14. Don't take yourself too seriously. I think the best way to make the most of this time in our lives is to not waste time being anxious. I'm only just entering my twenties and have already experienced so many new things both privately and professionally. I know that for me, i'm able to enjoy myself most when I don't let nerves get in the way. Most of the things I end up worrying about the most never even end up happening anyway! Let it go guys, just let it go.
15. Discover your purpose. Purpose is a fuel that's non-toxic to yourself and others. Find yours and own it. Word.
16. Choose your friends wisely. Look around at the people who surround you. Are they using their time and talents wisely? Have they decided what and who they want to be in life? Are they good people? Do they support your choices, good or bad? Your circle of influence defines who you are.
17. Know that you're more than your job. There's a real sense of ruthlessness and a survival of the fittest idealisation among us today - we like to think we're indestructible and so throw ourselves in the fire and never really think we're going to get burnt. Well that's awkward, because we do. Instead, think about what makes you happy. We are more than our job and university career. We all just need to slow down, breathe, and take the time to realise that we can create our own happiness in life.
18. Be honest. Be honest with yourself, honest with your relationships, and honest with how you see yourself in society. This alone can create an unequivocal sense of freedom.
19. Realize that your 20s are going to fly by. No joke. We'll all be thirty before we know it. And when you wake up thirty, the only question will be whether you gave it your all in your twenties. Just go for it! You might fail, but at least you had the guts to try. If there's something you want to do, then just go and bloody do it! Don't waste time by waiting around. Yolo, right?
20. Don't rush. So many people in their 20s are in a hurry to get to where they want to be - graduated, established, promoted, in love and god knows what else. Our twenties are a time where it is ok to make mistakes as long as we learn from them. Don't be in a rush to be who you are going to be. Just enjoy being who you are.
I'll leave it there guys, below are some images of my latest shenanigans and well, I guess you can say just loving life as a twenty something!
Spread the love guys and don't rush it.
Until next time.
L xo
Spread the love guys and don't rush it.
Until next time.
L xo
